Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
