yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
