how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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