Reggie can tackle my bush.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I will pee on everything he values.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
