Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize