They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
