please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
