I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
