i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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