I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Rumble strips road head = magical
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
