shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
