Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
