You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
