You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize