Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
