Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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