Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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