Having a random hookup so left but love u
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
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