If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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