i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
