Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
