We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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