dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
