you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
