love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
