Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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