i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We were destined to go to rehab together
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
