The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
