what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
