That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
This is classic penis vs brain.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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