Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
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