I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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