you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize
