sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Randomize
