so let's talk penis.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize