I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
