Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
