I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
