As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
