I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
