You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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