she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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