i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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