I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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