Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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