i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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