In the future we'll all be gay
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I smell stomach acid.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
