he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
