he puts the penis in happiness.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Can you bring me the toilet please
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
