TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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