I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I just found a bag of teeth...
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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