Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Why did my mother make you get naked?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
